Bereavement coordinator: what they do and how to work with one

Most families in hospice learn about the nurse, the social worker, and sometimes the chaplain. The bereavement coordinator is often the least-known member of the team, and one of the most underused. Understanding what a bereavement coordinator does, before you need them, changes how much value they can actually provide.

What a bereavement coordinator does

A bereavement coordinator is a counselor or social worker on the hospice team whose job is specifically focused on grief support. They work with families before the death and after it, for up to 13 months following a patient's death. This is a federally required component of Medicare-certified hospice care.

Their work typically includes:

• Assessing family members for grief risk factors, such as complicated grief history, social isolation, or significant life stressors
• Providing individual emotional support by phone or in person
• Facilitating family meetings when communication or decision-making is strained
• Connecting family members to community grief support resources, support groups, or therapists
• Sending check-in calls and cards after the death, particularly at the one-month and six-month marks
• Supporting family members who are experiencing anticipatory grief during the hospice period

The bereavement coordinator is not a therapist, and their sessions are not therapy. But they are trained grief professionals, and for many families they provide the most meaningful support they receive during this period.

When the bereavement coordinator starts working with your family

The bereavement coordinator typically makes contact early in the hospice enrollment, not just after the death. This matters because grief does not begin at the moment of death. It often begins at the moment of diagnosis, or when hospice starts, or at any number of points along the way.

The formal term for this is anticipatory grief, the grief of losing someone who is still alive. It is real, it is common, and most families experience it without naming it or getting support for it.

If no one from the hospice bereavement team has reached out to your family, you can ask your primary hospice nurse to connect you with the bereavement coordinator. You do not have to wait for a specific milestone to reach out.

How bereavement support works after the death

When a patient enrolled in Medicare-certified hospice dies, the hospice program is required to offer bereavement services to the family for 13 months. These services vary by hospice agency but typically include:

• Phone check-ins at regular intervals after the death
• Written materials about grief
• Information about support groups or community resources
• Individual counseling sessions, either in person or by phone, depending on the agency and geography

This support is included in the Medicare hospice benefit. There is no additional cost.

Participation is voluntary. Some families use it extensively; others do not use it at all. But knowing it exists, and that it is available when you want it, can make the months after a death feel less unsupported.

Who bereavement support is for

Bereavement services are available to any family member or close friend who was part of the patient's support network. You do not have to be a spouse or immediate family member. You do not have to have been the primary caregiver.

Children who were close to the person who died can also receive support. The hospice bereavement coordinator can talk with children directly, suggest age-appropriate books and resources, and help parents know how to talk to their kids about what happened.

Friends who were close to the patient can often receive bereavement check-ins as well. Ask the coordinator what the agency's policy is.

What to ask your bereavement coordinator

When you first speak with the bereavement coordinator, a few questions worth asking:

• What does the check-in schedule look like after the death?
• If I am struggling, can I call and schedule a session?
• Are there in-person or virtual support groups available?
• Are there resources specifically for children?
• Is there a grief therapist you would recommend if I find I need more intensive support?

The coordinator is not offended by direct questions. They expect them.

The limits of bereavement support

Bereavement coordinators and hospice grief support are valuable, but they have limits.

Hospice bereavement services are not a substitute for mental health treatment. If you or another family member is experiencing prolonged inability to function, symptoms of depression or anxiety that are not improving, or thoughts of self-harm, please speak with a primary care physician or licensed mental health professional directly. The bereavement coordinator can provide a referral.

Complicated grief, also called prolonged grief disorder, affects roughly 7 to 10 percent of bereaved people. It involves persistent, debilitating grief that does not follow the typical pattern. It is a recognized clinical condition and responds well to specific therapeutic approaches. Hospice bereavement services can identify it and refer accordingly, but they do not treat it.

Frequently asked questions

Does every hospice program have a bereavement coordinator?

Medicare-certified hospice programs are required to have a bereavement coordinator and to provide bereavement services. If you are working with a Medicare-certified hospice and no one has mentioned the bereavement coordinator, ask your primary nurse to make the introduction.

Is bereavement support confidential?

Yes. Conversations with the bereavement coordinator are confidential, with the standard exceptions for situations involving imminent risk of harm.

What if we live far from the hospice and cannot meet in person?

Most bereavement coordinators conduct support by phone and some by video call. Geographic distance is not a barrier to accessing this support.

Can I keep working with the bereavement coordinator after the 13-month period?

The Medicare benefit covers up to 13 months. If you find the relationship valuable and want to continue, some hospice agencies will continue to provide support informally or can refer you to a community grief counselor.

What Passings can help with

Passings's guided checklist covers the practical decisions families face during hospice and in the weeks after a death. If you are organizing what needs to be done while also navigating grief, Passings can help you keep track without having to hold it all in your head. Whenever you're ready, we'll be here.

Related resources

• What is hospice care: a plain-English guide for families
• How to prepare when a parent enters hospice care
• Planning during hospice: a family guide
• Understanding the stages of grief

Passings is not a law firm and does not provide legal or medical advice. This article is for general informational purposes. For advice specific to your situation, consult a licensed healthcare professional or licensed grief therapist.

Disclaimer — For informational purposes only

This article is compiled from publicly available resources and is provided solely for general informational purposes. It does not constitute and should not be relied upon as legal, financial, tax, insurance, medical, psychological, or other professional advice. Passings is a planning and organizational platform, not a licensed advisory service, and no attorney-client, financial advisor-client, or other professional relationship is created by reading this content.

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